All posts with the ‘ interests ’ Tag

Interest based negotiation sounds all slick and cool when you only have a couple interests to track.

But what about if you’re a normal person and you have, on average, about two dozen interests competing for your attention in any given moment?

How do you figure out which interests to pay attention to when you’re negotiating? And how can you tell if you’re letting irrelevant … Read More

Perhaps one of the most useful phrases I’ve ever learned is “Yes, and….”

It’s a pretty simple little phrase, and not exactly revolutionary.  I’d probably said it a thousand times before I was taught it.

Because it’s not just the phrase, “yes, and…”, it’s when you use it.

You use it when your negotiation counterpart has just said something you KNOW is ill-informed and if … Read More

Personally, one of the most frustrating things about negotiating is that sometimes it just doesn’t work out.

I can do everything that I think will positively influence the negotiation, that will create a valuable, beneficial exchange for both sides, and it just doesn’t work.

For me, “doesn’t work” means we don’t come to an agreement; I get less than what I was after and don’t … Read More

It’s all nice and good to be able to negotiate when there is a contract, a fancy piece of paper that an attorney’s been paid to stick “wheretofors” and “hereafters” all over.  But what happens when you don’t have a written contract?  What happens when it’s a conversation over coffee and a handshake?

Oh, Money.

You are so green.  So useful!  So necessary for the comfort to which I’ve become accustomed.

I understand there are some good people who manage to have very happy lives thinking about you only a little bit.  On alternate Tuesdays and every third Friday afternoon.

And even though I recycle, love puppies and volunteer my free time to the betterment of my fellow … Read More

NEWS FLASH

I know.  It is a horrible realization.

In addition to getting The Girl, having the Best Car & being the Nicest Person you’ve ever met, those charming kids get to be better negotiators.

Why?

Well, because charming people are charming.

You want to talk to them; you want to spend time with them; you even want to be … Read More

I gotta say that one more time: You. Are. Hot.

Like “Joan Jett” hot.

Why?

Because you’ve made it this far along in our exciting journey of figuring out how, why and when to share information during a negotiation.

To summarize:  if you want the information you share to help you, you need to know who you’re negotiating with and what kind … Read More

The kind of negotiation I advocate is a style where information needs to be shared because you’re not talking with the other person about the thing you want, you’re talking about why you want what you want.

I believe that negotiations are essentially problem solving events, and, as such, it’s more important to know all the factors contributing to the problem than it is to … Read More